Study of Life
by Fae 206
Summary: AR. Kuon Hizuri grew up in Japan with his family where he was never able to achieve his dreams of acting so decided to become a doctor. Kyoko Mogami never followed Sho to Tokyo but was able to get into Tokyo University to study law. When the two of them meet within the same university there is a spark of life, love, and hope of achieving those acting dreams.
1. Chapter 1 - High Shelves

**AN:** Yet again another new fic, this actually takes a route of what would happen had Kuon lived in Japan with his family and not gone into acting and Sho hadn't taken Kyoko to Tokyo but she had managed to get into the prestigious Tokyo U on her own academic skill.

 **Study of Life**

 **Chapter One: High Shelves**

 _If you do want to pursue a career in law then you are to do it away from Kyoto. I don't want to be associated with you by being in the same area let alone firm. However, I will give you the money to do this so you don't disgrace the Mogami name._

Kyoko sighed as those words rolled around in her head. She wanted the echo of her mother's rejection of her to soon fade into the background but they seemed to be all she could think about after moving here. She had ranked within the top five of entrants for Tokyo University and she was excited to get to study the law. Being within the top five was such an honor for her, all of these other students must have done amazingly in their high profile schools, their cram schools, and yet just by slowing it down, she had done so well.

Talk about high profile, there was something that she needed right now and that would take a high profile person. She had decided that she was going to pick up her school books for the upcoming classes but the book that she needed for her composition class was right at top and she hated being so short. Maybe there was a ladder that she could use.

She looked from side to side, no ladder. She needed to find some way of…she steadied herself and kicked off her shoes before putting her left foot on the second bookshelf. She was about to pull herself up when she saw a blond student approaching her. She froze as she stared at him, seeing those emerald eyes, that warm smile.

"Hold on," he laughed as Kyoko froze, "Get your feet on the ground, here," he said as he put a hand on Kyoko's back to steady her. "Which one is it?" he asked as he looked at the titles and Kyoko still stared at him, her eyes widening. "I'm not that handsome," he told her with a grin and Kyoko paused.

"You don't remember me?" she asked and the older student turned to her.

"I'm so sorry, I don't remember a lot of people. I don't have the advantage that you do," he said gesturing to the hair and the eyes. "You want to explain to -"

"You're Corn, aren't you?" she asked and the blond looked excited, his eyes widening a little.

"Kyoko-chan," he said before looking back at the books, "Great to see you again. It's a bit far from Kyoto. So which is the book that you're having trouble getting?" he asked and Kyoko paused staring at him.

"You're not from fairyland are you?" Kyoko said staring at him in disbelief and Kuon bowed his head, he looked remorseful of what he had just said. He took a weak breath in before looking at the books on the lowest shelf.

"No, I'm not. I thought that my life was going to turn out differently, I thought that…." Kuon tried to explain to her, his voice starting to get quieter as he made that explanation. "I wasn't trying to be rude to you. I thought that telling you those things when you were a child would help you, you loved fairytales and -"

"And it's okay," Kyoko replied as she felt guilt seeing him looking so sad. "I'm just really pleased that you remember me. It was such a short summer together that the fact you remember those times means that I made a difference to you. It's great to see you here….uh….whatever your name is."

"It's Ku-on," Kuon said slowly as he looked at her, "So which book were you attempting to get again?"

Kyoko looked at the top shelf and pointed out the one that she had started to climb for, she watched as Kuon easily took it from the row and handed it to her. She held it to her chest, taking a breath in as she thought about her old friend. He seemed to be doing well but it was as if something had darkened his shadow and stolen his light.

"Thank you," she said before pausing, "Can I ask you a question?" she said and Kuon laughed.

"Sure, you want me to show you where to go?" he asked and Kyoko shook her head, "Then whatever question you may have, my lady," he winked, "please go ahead and ask."

"Did you ever escape your father's influence upon you?" Kyoko asked and Kuon froze, his entire body grew tense and the look of depression was settled in his eyes. He took a deep breath in before looking away from her trying to avoid eye contact.

"We all have different paths in our lives, sometimes you don't go down the one that you want but if you work hard you might get something better," Kuon told her and Kyoko blinked at him. "Would you like to have dinner tonight?" he asked and Kyoko watched him.

"As a date?" she asked and Kuon shook his head.

"Sorry to disappoint you but no, not a date, just some way of catching up, finding out what you've been doing for the past twelve years," he grinned and Kyoko felt herself captivated by that smile. She nodded before writing down her phone number for him.

"Here," Kuon said as he handed her a business card for a modelling agency, "I do some work at times for the agency, just to help my mother out," he said and Kyoko looked down at the card.

"Your last name is Hizuri?" she asked and Kuon gave a sad nod, "Like the famous actor Kuu Hizuri?"

"Yeah, his hands are enormous," Kuon said before looking away. He didn't want to admit that for so many years of his life he had wanted to be an actor but it wasn't for him, he wasn't someone to be celebrated as an actor despite how much he wanted it. He just had to accept that sometimes you didn't meet your dreams in life, hopefully what he did have would turn out to be something even better.


	2. Chapter 2 - The Shallow Playboy

**AN:** I was originally going to do a huge update of about forty fics but felt that I was moving too slowly so just decided to update with what I have and then on the 20th update again and so forth on the 30th. I hope you enjoy.

 **Chapter Two – The Shallow Playboy**

Kyoko looked around at the area. This was somewhere in Shibuya that she was unfamiliar with despite the fact that she had lived in Tokyo for a few months so she could prepare for college and the university tests. She had always stuck to smaller establishments, ramen shops, food carts. There was one place that she adored called Daruma-ya because of the welcoming staff. She hadn't really spent a lot of time at these fancy dining restaurants with their silk tablecloths and multiple forks in the silverware.

Corn had good taste but then, hadn't she always known that about him. Even in her belief that he was a prince of fairyland, he had been a prince.

She was glad that she had decided to show up in a skirt and a nice blouse for the meal. She would have hated to dress in anything too casual and be an embarrassment to him. He was from a wealthy family and he had celebrity status because of his father. Maybe the paparazzi was even watching him because he was in the Hizuri family. No, even the paparazzi weren't that desperate.

"Hello," Kuon said as he stepped forwards in a pair of dress pants and a button up designed shirt. "Are you ready to go in? You're looking quite beautiful tonight, Kyoko-san or is it Mogami-san, which are you more comfortable with?"

"Kyoko is fine, Kuon" Kyoko grinned to him and saw him offer her his arm. He was quite a gentleman. She entered the restaurant and listened as Kuon talked about his reservations at that place.

"Someone new with you tonight," the host said as he led them to a quite table in the back of the restaurant. Kyoko blinked. Somebody new? What was he talking about? Well, she didn't want to think about it. Maybe Kuon went here with his friends or maybe he was friends with the host or something like that. Although, if she had to think realistically, maybe it meant that Kuon went here with his girlfriend. She didn't want to have anyone make a wrong guess and criticize him for this.

"I…I am new," Kyoko nodded and Kuon looked to the host.

"This isn't a date, just two old friends catching up. We haven't seen each other since we were children, I want to learn what my old friend Kyoko has been up to. This isn't a date," Kuon laughed as Kyoko sat down. She coughed before sitting up with better posture in the chair. Him repeating that was like a sword stabbing her in the chest but he was right. This wasn't a date.

"May I start you off with something to drink?" the waiter asked and Kyoko looked down. Were they splitting the bill or was…no she couldn't just expect for Kuon to treat her. What was she thinking? Even if this was a date, in these modern times people usually split the bill.

"I'll have a water," Kyoko said and Kuon looked up at the waiter.

"I'll have a beer," he turned to Kyoko, "You can have anything that you like. I'm covering the bill for both of us tonight so pick anything at all that you'd like to eat or drink."

Kyoko's eyes widened, "I can't let you…"

"I'm just happy to be spending time with my childhood friend," Kuon smiled and Kyoko blushed as she looked down.

"Maybe a small iced tea?" she asked and the waiter nodded. Kyoko looked through the menu. There was a lot of good food here but she was most drawn to the hamburger with fries. It was an American dish but then a lot of the food here seemed American. She wondered what Kuon would choose. He seemed to know more about American cuisine than she did.

"Kuon?" a woman said as she approached the table. She put her hands on her hips and saw that Kuon rolled his eyes as if this woman was already an annoyance to him. Kyoko however was more interested in what was happening and why this woman had approached them. "Are you stupid? You have a girlfriend, well you had one before you broke up with her," she said and Kyoko looked at Kuon. She felt uncomfortable being here.

"She told me that if I didn't follow her out of the restaurant she was going to go to the guy that she was in love with," he shrugged, "Why should I stand in the way of true love?"

"You do know that she was testing you, right?" the woman asked with her chin raised. "And yet only a week later you're here with another girl, a much younger girl. Seriously?"

"I…well, I'm not his girlfriend. We were friends when we were little, we're just catching up," Kyoko tried to explain.

"Well that's good because this guy doesn't know how to hang onto a girl. I mean already hitting on girls when he's just broken up with his girlfriend. I mean, I know that the two of you were just dating for three weeks but she really cared for you and the two of you broke up," the woman continued and Kuon laughed bitterly.

"Seriously, you've just told me that we broke up. Me and Naomi _broke up_ ," he stressed "Even if this was a date, it doesn't matter because Naomi and I had a break up. We weren't right for each other," Kuon explained and the woman raised an eyebrow.

"They say you go on dates with women here all the time, what is it they said, that there's a new flavor of the month for you when women are involved," the woman said before looking at Kyoko. "I'm going to go back and finish my dinner but don't date this guy. He doesn't know how to truly take care of a girlfriend."

Kuon sighed as she walked away and turned to Kyoko, "Sorry, did that ruin the night for you, we can leave if you want to?"

"No," Kyoko replied honestly. She looked at him, her eyes trying to search his for the truth in what was going on. Was he really such a playboy that every month he had a new girl on his arm. She couldn't believe that Corn was inconsiderate to women. He seemed such a nice guy. Wouldn't he want a long term relationship where he was with a woman that he would want to marry, settle down and have children with, know that there was somebody with a ring on her finger that he had put there himself.

"It's not that I don't enjoy the women," Kuon said and Kyoko felt a little awkward with that word. Enjoy the women? It wasn't as if they were dolls or toys that he could manipulate. She didn't know what that word was but it didn't make her feel special. "It's just that some relationships bore me and I don't know how to get out of them. I do tend to date a lot of girls but then most guys do."

"Are you admitting that you're a player, Kuon?" Kyoko asked, her face neutral.

"Maybe but I'm not mean to these women," Kuon shrugged, "Dating should be fun. It's not as if I can be an actor so it's nice to be with some women who want to have a good time and they seem to come to me, it's not as if I seek them out. So, yeah, sometimes my relationships are short but it's entertaining. I'm never looking for anything serious."

"Are the girls?" Kyoko asked and Kuon shrugged, "So you've turned into a playboy?" she asked and Kuon sighed.

"Look, I didn't ask you here to get judged on what I decide to do with my time. Maybe if my dreams of acting had worked out then I would be too busy and too conscious of my public image to date women with this type of freedom but they didn't" Kuon smiled to the waiter as he came along. Once they had ordered their food Kyoko sighed. "What is it?"

"I just don't think that that's a good enough reason to date continuous women and I know that it isn't my place but don't you feel lonely?" she asked him and Kuon looked down.

"The loneliest I ever felt was when I gave up my dreams of being an actor," he admitted and Kyoko sighed. Maybe there was still a way that he could act. Would that lead him to give up this foolish dating game that he appeared to be playing. Maybe she could help him with that the way that the stone he had given her had helped her so many times in the past and was still doing so in the present.

…

…

Kuon looked out the window of his apartment. Was he really hurting the women in the way it had seemed to Kyoko and Naomi's friend. Was he really such a playboy that it was becoming hurtful to other people as well as ruining his own image. He sighed, he had never meant to hurt anyone but after giving up his dreams it seemed that he wanted to have fun in life. He had tried so hard and it had ended up amounting to nothing. He was going to continue to be under his father's shadow.

He sighed and closed his eyes before sitting on his bed. He really had to think about this. Did he want to be the playboy that they thought that he was or did he want to work on getting better and having a better image to others.

He was about to answer the question for himself when he heard his phone buzz. He looked at it and saw that it was his father calling him. If he didn't come up with an excuse for not answering the phone then his dad was going to get concerned for him again.

He had to pick it up and pretend that everything was okay.

"Hey," he smiled weakly as he forced the happiness in his voice, "How's it going?" Kuon shuddered as he heard the sounds of the crew from whatever set his father was on. His dad never knew how much hearing his success in acting hurt him. He didn't need to know that.

"Good. We just finished a take, they say that it might even make it to America," Kuu laughed and Kuon felt the sting in his heart. "How are your studies? Looking at top spot again? I've been telling my costars about how you -"

"I'm fine," Kuon said as he cut his father off. "Studies are going well. I think that I might have to invest some more time to get that number one spot since there are always more challengers but it's good. Hard work though."

"Well, hard work is always a good sign that you're strong enough to make it. It's pretty tough as an actor too," Kuu said not knowing how the words were slicing into Kuon's heart. It was as if his hungry father was trying to make his heart into sashimi with the accuracy of these slices.

"Yeah, I think I have to get back to my studies now but I'm excited for this new term," Kuon lied but Kuu couldn't detect it.

"I know that you'll do me proud," he laughed, "You already make me proud," he continued and Kuon laughed softly.

"Thanks, Dad, but I really have to study. I'll call you later, okay?" he asked and Kuu responded happily before Kuon put down the phone. He had always really wanted to be an actor and he had to keep lying that he was happy in what he was doing. He had tried his best but he hadn't had the luck that it took to be the actor he had wanted to become.

Still, maybe he had made a mistake in being a playboy. Maybe he should take Kyoko's advice and try to build a relationship with a woman. He looked at his phone before deciding to make a call, it was answered on the third ring.

"Hello?" he heard the woman at the other side say in a nervous manner.

"Naomi, it's Kuon," Kuon said, "I'm so sorry. I made a huge mistake with you. I'm really sorry that I was such a jerk to you and I hope you forgive me."

"I…" Naomi said before laughing happily, "I'm an idiot, I must sound like an idiot, but I was really hoping you'd call and tell me that. Do you want to catch a movie this weekend and then I can have you make up for trying to break up with me."

"Sounds good, I wonder what my punishment will be?" Kuon asked. Hopefully this was a step in the right direction and hopefully Naomi really was giving him a second chance to make things right and to have a lasting relationship with her.

 **End of Chapter Two**

 **Thank you for reading**

 **Thank you to the reviewers of Chapter One**

ErzaTsuruga, Guineapigs1, Kris XD, paulagato, Umiron, zealith

 **Response to Reviews**

I'm glad that you guys like this chapter. I'm trying to keep the characters in character as much as possible whilst also exploring how this type of life would change them. I'm very appreciative of the support and I hope that you're enjoying the fic 😊


	3. Chapter 3 - False Interactions

**AN:** Hope you guys enjoy this chapter 😊 Thank you for all of your support.

 **Chapter Three – False Interactions**

One-week later Kyoko had just started her first prelaw class, Introduction to the Fundamentals of Legal Proceedings. Usually you would be a second year to take the class but Kyoko had actually proven through her entrance exams that she could handle it. The one problem though was that the teaching assistant was a woman named Naomi. _Kuon's girlfriend_.

Kyoko felt it was strange that she had become so jealous of this woman. She wasn't dating Kuon and she had never dated Kuon so why couldn't she watch her childhood friend find happiness with another woman. Maybe that was it. Kuon didn't appear to be happy, he appeared to be acting and somehow this Naomi girl hadn't noticed that.

Kyoko sighed as she looked down at her notes and started to highlight the key notes from the lesson. It was then that she saw the blond enter the classroom and he took Naomi's hand in his, kissing her cheek. Naomi was a little bit taller than her, well she looked like a model and had a model's height so it was much easier for Corn to kiss her. Kyoko paused before blushing. She didn't want to think about that. Kuon was her friend and she had already experienced heartache once before when Shotaro had left her in Kyoto and gone to Tokyo without her.

No. She had to concentrate on her studies.

"So, have you made up your mind on where I should take you to dinner tonight?" Kuon asked with a smile that Naomi seemed to fool for but Kyoko knew wasn't real. It was what she would refer to as a "gentleman's smile" one that seemed genuine to most but was actually concealing some hidden emotions.

Naomi giggled, "I could go anywhere with you, Kuon, as long as its not the place you broke up with me." Naomi held his hands and took a step back to look him over. "You promise not to hurt me like that again?" she asked and Kuon continued to use that smile.

"I'll try my best not to," he told her before tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "I'm so lucky that you decided to take a fool like me back," he grinned and Naomi nodded.

"Yes, you are very very lucky," she said before kissing his cheek, "But I'll forgive you. I really want this to work, Kuon."

"Yes. Me too," he grinned before wrapping her in his arms and she pressed him back before he leaned her back against the desk. Kyoko stood. She didn't want to see whatever dirty thoughts had crossed her friend's mind. He seemed so different than the boy that she had met when she was six.

"Ahem," she coughed causing them both to look at her. "I'm sorry, could you please not…."

"We weren't going to," Naomi said quickly before dropping into a bow, "I'm so sorry, Mogami-san. I didn't realize that you were here. I didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable. I truly am sorry for letting myself get so relaxed."

"I think it's his fault anyway," Kyoko said as she gestured to Kuon who looked at her a little offended. "He says he wants to be a doctor but he obviously doesn't know when to control himself."

Kuon stared at her as if she had temporarily lost her mind. This wasn't the girl that he had thought she knew. She always had respect for her seniors and he was her sempai. He had been nice to her throughout their time reconnecting. He didn't know why she was so angry at him.

"Did I do something to upset you, Kyoko-chan?" he asked and Naomi looked between them.

"No, Corn, no, you didn't do anything," she replied as she put her books into her bag and started to leave the lecture hall. She walked down the steps and her body brushed against Kuon's. He looked to her before putting a hand on her upper arm.

"May I talk to you?" he asked and Kyoko nodded, gesturing for them to go outside. "I'll be right back," Kuon said as he turned to Naomi again. Kyoko rolled her eyes but was glad that the other woman didn't see that.

Once they were alone in the hallway, Kuon stood with his arms folded. Kyoko sighed, she hadn't meant to upset him. It didn't change the fact that he was fooling around with the other girl still despite what he might be telling himself about wanting to make it work.

"What was that?" he asked her, his voice sounding a little annoyed. "You first tell me that you don't think I should be fooling around with girls and then you try to make a scene in front of my girlfriend. I want to be your friend but you're making it a little hard for me," he told her and Kyoko looked up at him, her eyes challenging him.

"Do you love her?" she asked and Kuon opened his mouth a few times to reply but closed it. In the end he opened his mouth, unable to make eye contact with Kyoko.

"Love is a tricky thing. I don't….you don't fool in love with someone so early in your relationship. It's…maybe you don't know what love is," he said and Kyoko could see some beads of sweat as he told her this. She hummed.

"Okay, maybe not love, but do you even like her?" she asked and Kuon paused not sure how to answer that question. "If you don't even like her in that way then you're leading the two of you down a road of heartbreak," she told him and Kuon scoffed, shaking his head.

"You know nothing about love," he commented before returning to the classroom.

…

…

Kuon had dressed in a formal shirt and dress pants as he walked onto the area where his father was shooting his latest drama. He felt uncomfortable here but he didn't want to admit it to the man on the set. His father was well-known for his work and had won so many awards that he didn't even realize how much seeing him work stabbed Kuon in the gut. He knew so much more about medicine than his dad did and he was told by many professors that they could see him as chief of medicine one day but he wanted to act.

Acting was just a childhood fantasy because of how he had idolized his dad as a child. He had to accept that.

"Kuon," Kuu said happily as he wiped the makeup off of his face, "You came early this time. I tell you, coming somewhere promptly is because of your Japanese work ethic. Did you want me to show you around? You could meet some of the industry professionals. There's this model Honoka-chan who you would make a beautiful couple with," he said and Kuon sighed. The reason he always arrived to these meetings on the dot was because of the preparation he needed to come here.

"Thanks, Dad. I'm trying to do that, I'll try harder next time," he said and Kuu tilted his head to the side.

"Are you okay? If you're not feeling like going out to eat then we could do something else," he suggested and Kuon looked at him, using that fake smile again that somehow Kuu couldn't see through.

"Dinner sounds great, Dad. I'll let you get changed in your dressing room whilst I wait outside the studio. I have to check up on some things for class anyway," he lied but Kuu nodded, accepting that excuse.

"You know," Kuu said happily, not even grasping onto how uncomfortable his son was seeing the world which he had never been able to break into, "You're going to be one wonderful doctor someday soon," he said and Kuon nodded.

"Thanks, Dad" he said with a heavy exhale before walking away and going to outside the studio. He took his phone from his pocket and looked at the numbers of his contacts. There were many acquaintances that he only half-knew on his phone but then he stopped on one of them, his finger hovering over the name.

Kyoko had been so right about him. He didn't love Naomi and he was faking his relationship with her and hoping that at some point it would all click and he would fall for her. That strategy hadn't really been working so far. How was she so right about him? It seemed as if she could see through his lies and connect with him mentally. No, he was losing it. They had only met again recently, she didn't understand his life, how could she?

Kuon resisted the urge to phone her as he sat outside the studio.

One thought haunted him though. Why did he want to spend time with her more than he wanted to spend time with his own girlfriend? Nostalgia. It must be nostalgia.

…

…

Kyoko was walking down the hallway of the university when her eyes caught hold of something on the announcement board. She took a step back. The drama department were doing casting calls for a retelling of the famous story, "The Tale of Genji." It was a mostly male-dominated story with the women being concubines and so it seemed interesting that they would decide to do this one. Still, it might be fun to sign up for it.

Kyoko laughed to herself. She wasn't an actress. She wasn't even really interested in acting and she had far too much work to allow her mind to wander to anything that wouldn't benefit her studies. She did think of _him_ though. She could imagine Corn as an actor, doing the different roles with ease and proving that he had at least as much talent as his famous father. He had given up on acting though. Whether he would be interested in something like this was a gamble and he most likely would pretend he didn't want to.

She knew that he had the talent and dedication to do amazingly at whatever he wanted to do. However, talent and dedication sometimes took that energy away from having fun and feeling happy. She had experienced that as a child.

She took a copy of the paper anyway, maybe she could show it to him the next time she saw him. Taking a deep breath, she walked out of the university and made her way to a small, secluded area where she felt that only she knew. It was her secret area.

Kyoko closed her eyes as she listened to the birds chirping and the wind through the trees. She thought about how beautiful the flowers were and how calming the sound of the river was. It was a place where she thought she could be truly happ- wow, the smell of cigarette smoke was overwhelming to her.

Had somebody claimed her secret spot? She covered her mouth and walked forwards, her eyes widening as she caught sight of Kuon smoking. She didn't know that he did that. She was about to open her mouth to get his attention but she noticed that though the cigarette was in one hand, he was reading the novel of The Tale of Genji in the other. So, he had heard about the play?

Kyoko grinned excitedly. She hoped that he would sign up and audition for it. She would love to see him on stage.

She was about to talk to him about the auditions before she saw him slip a bookmark into the book. He didn't look happy and there was a dark cloud around him that wasn't being formed by the cigarette. She froze as she saw him unbutton the cuff of his shirt and pull it back. Her eyes widened as she watched him take the cigarette and press it onto his skin, burning himself.

What on earth was he doing?

 **End of Chapter Three**

 **Thank you for reading**

 **Thank you to the reviewers of Chapter Two**

Erza Tsuruga, Guest, Kris XD, melchormonica8, misherukuro

 **Response to Reviews**

Well, in this fic, Kuon has already dated Naomi in the past and it's very unlikely that he would choose Kyoko over her since he has only just reconnected with Kyoko, they have to develop feelings for one another first because Kuon doesn't want to end things on bad terms with her. For those of you who know me, you know I love Kuu but the sadness and pain can only work with Kuu being a bit oblivious to Kuon's pain that he's not an actor.


	4. Chapter 4 - The Failure of a Son

**AN:** In this chapter I could really see what people mean when they say my chapters are super short but I kind of like them this length (I actually was only writing 1500 last year per chapter). I think I'm going to try to aim for 2,200 soon so they'll be a little longer but anyway, hope you enjoy.

 **Chapter Four – The Failure of A Son**

Kyoko's eyes widened and she stared at the man in front of her as her body started feeling cold and numb. She looked at him before noticing that this wasn't the first burn mark. She would have never expected this from the little boy that she had met in the woods in Kyoto and she wanted it to stop. She took another breath in. She didn't want to move too fast and accuse him of what he was doing, she didn't feel any right to. She would ignore it this time but if it happened again she might talk to him about it.

She walked over to him with a smile and he put the cigarette out, looking a little taken aback. "Hi, I didn't know I'd run into you out here," she told him and he smiled. "You smoke?" she asked as if that was the shocking thing about the situation. Kuon turned to her before nodding slowly.

"Yeah, it's a bad habit I guess," Kuon shrugged as he turned from her and Kyoko shook her head.

"It's something that a lot of people do, Kuon," she told him before looking up. "Sometimes smoking has been said to take stress away. I don't really like it but that's my choice not to do it. I mean, if something helps you deal with this crazy world," she said and Kuon sighed. So she hadn't seen him burning himself or she would have said something to him about it.

"Thanks," he shrugged. "So, what brings you out here? Anything that you wanted to talk about?"

Kyoko opened her mouth to try to get her excitement out about the play and how she wanted to see Kuon perform. She knew that he was talented enough to be an actor despite what other people might say. He didn't have to deprive himself of something that he enjoyed because people compared him to his father. No, he could become his own person and live his dream.

"There's a play, you know, based on the Tale of Genji," she said and he shrugged.

"Odd choice, one of the earliest novels," he said and Kyoko looked down at the book that he was holding, she hummed and he followed her line of sight before he lifted the book. He paled before shaking his head. "You should sign up," she commented and he froze, shaking his head again.

"I can't. I can't play a role in this play," he said, "I was just reading it out of interest for historical literature," he saw her watching him trying to convince him to confess to her but he wasn't ready. "I want to be a doctor. Saving people, saving lives, that's what matters to me. I've been doing all of this work to get my medical degree. I'd make a great doctor," he said firmly and Kyoko sighed.

"I'm not saying that you wouldn't be a fantastic doctor," she argued before standing up and reached out for his hand. "I'd like to show you something, Corn," she said and he continued to stare at her. Kyoko sighed before looking him directly in the eyes, "Don't you trust me?" she asked and he slowly held her hand. She pulled him up and then led him into the school and down the hallway.

They stopped at where the acting stage was and Kuon felt his stomach turn inside out. He didn't want to be here. He didn't want to be reminded of the dream that he didn't have, the dream that he just couldn't have. This isn't where he should be. This wasn't what he was meant to do in his life. He had already tried in the past and he had failed spectacularly.

"I want for you to stand on that stage and tell me how it feels. Stand there and honestly tell me that you don't want to act," she said and Kuon shook his head.

"I'm not meant to act, as much as I might want to," he tried to explain but Kyoko still had great determination as she stood facing him. She gestured again to the stage but he shook his head. "I can't do it, okay?" he asked her and Kyoko sighed. "I'm not meant to be an actor, I'm supposed to be studying medical cases so that I can become a doctor, a physician. I want to be able to be a surgeon if I choose to do that route. I don't have time for acting."

"You would have time if you really wanted it," Kyoko told him and Kuon turned to look at her.

"What do you mean by that?" he asked about to talk about the busy work load that any medical student had in a college this prestigious and well-known. She was a pre-law student, if anyone would understand it should be her and she was trying to motivate him to be an actor? This was a waste of both of their time.

"You could do both," Kyoko told him. "You won't know what you want until you stand on the stage and try, really try to feel how it would be to live as an actor. Is it that scary to try to do something simple like that?" she asked and Kuon stared at her.

"It's not simple," he said but Kyoko took his hand again and pulled him to the stage. He was too shocked to resist her at first but then he found himself wanting to experience how it felt to stand on a stage, imagining the audience cheering for him. He wanted this but he was too afraid to want it. He didn't want to be in his father's shadow but he did still dream of how it would be to act.

It was just too painful to want something but know that you'd never be as good as they wanted you to be.

He wasn't Kuu Hizuri after all.

…

…

Despite his busy schedule, Kuon had managed to schedule an appointment with his father and they were meeting at a well-known restaurant at the corner table so they would be able to eat in peace. Kuon sighed, he wasn't sure how to begin talking to his father about this but he took a look at the burns from the cigarettes that were starting to slowly heal. Maybe he shouldn't be saying this at all.

He kept his head bowed before he heard someone behind him and quickly covered up the burns before they were noticed. He didn't know how to approach this conversation but maybe it would come up naturally. He turned and then was surprised to see a man his own age. His father sat down but the man was next to him and Kuon paled.

"Uh, sorry," he said as he looked at the man who was flipping through a schedule at this time. "I'm sorry," he said quickly as he looked at the other man who wasn't even acknowledging him. "I thought that we were going to have a meal together, uh, Dad?" he asked and Kuu gestured to the man.

"The agency saw that I had a lot of work that was lined up and then some things went wrong so Matsuhara-san here is going to be adjusting my schedule. I'm sorry that I wasn't able to talk to you about it before," he said and Kuon smiled politely, "He is going to keep things confidential but I was unable to avoid it."

Kuon looked at him before nodding in a monotone way. He definitely didn't feel comfortable discussing his depression anymore. This man, Matsuhara, might even want to turn it into a story that would show Kuu's humanity and how he could be related with, try to get anyone with any feelings of depression to want Kuu to be part of their family. "Let's just order," he suggested and Kuu looked at him.

"Kuon, if this is financial," he said and Kuon looked at him horrified. He hadn't come to ask his father for money, he wasn't that much of an inconsiderate deadbeat son. He wasn't that much of a disgrace to the Hizuri family.

"Why do you think it's financial?" he asked and Kuu paused.

"Well, it's just that acting brings in a lot of money," Kuu told him and Kuon bowed his head, he wanted to become deaf for just ten minutes. He didn't want to hear these words. His dad was too blind with his own fame to know how much these words affected him, how they were clawing at him from the inside trying to get out and feel some kind of relief.

"You know," Kuon said bitterly, "Becoming a doctor despite having had to pay a lot for university can actually bring in a lot of money too. Depending on who the celebrity is, being a doctor can lead to someone earning more money than a celebrity, of course I'm not going to make as much money as you are, Dad," he growled quietly and Matsuhara looked up at him, rather taken aback by those words.

"I do understand that," Kuu said as he turned to Matsuhara, "Kuon, I thought that you just wanted to have a nice dinner. Is there something that I'm not understanding?" he asked and Kuon sighed before standing up. He wasn't going to lose it and become emotional, he had to keep himself hardened to the world and control his own pain.

"Oh, forget it," he said as he picked up his bag and caused other diners to look at him. "Seriously, why didn't you tell Mom to get an abortion when she got pregnant?" he asked before looking down as Kuu stared at him confused and in shock. "You never even wanted me as a son," he said and then turned before Kuu could form his next words.

That was wrong but Kuu didn't know what to say about it. How could Kuon say something like that? Was his son going through another rebellious phase? Had Kuu done something that he didn't know about because Kuon just seemed to be rebelling against him and creating even more of a divide between them. If his son wasn't ready and willing to speak with him then Kuu didn't know how he could help or how he could figure out what he had done wrong.

Meanwhile Kuon's heart pounded in his chest as he tried to make his way home. He could hear his heart practically shattering his chest and the world seemed to get smaller, more closed in and his breath was racing. What was happening? He heard someone call his name but his mind was spinning too much to be able to make sense of what was going on.

"Kuon!" he heard someone yell at him and as he tried to calm down, he saw Naomi holding his wrist, her eyes blinking up at him with such earnest compassion and concern. He took a few deep breaths in as he saw her and then for a second imagined Kyoko in her place. What was he thinking about? He wasn't in a relationship with Kyoko but part of him really would have wanted her to be in Naomi's place.

"Kuon!?" she asked again, "What's going on? What's happening? Are you okay?"

"Yes," he said breathlessly as he pulled her towards him. He had to be satisfied with her. Kyoko wasn't here and he wasn't sure why he wanted her so badly anyway. Naomi wrapped her arms around him, pressing her head into his chest.

"It's okay, sweet heart" she whispered before seeing the burns on his arm. She felt tears in her eyes but she refused to say anything now. They had just gotten back together and she didn't want this relationship to end. She wouldn't say anything about the harm that he was causing herself or that she didn't know why he was doing it. All she wanted to do was take care of him and make sure he got him home safely.

Kuon however was wondering why he wanted Kyoko in her place. Nostalgia again, yeah that was it, definitely not a situation that meant he loved her or anything.

 **End of Chapter Four**

 **Thank you for reading, reviews are appreciated**

 **Thank you to reviewers of Chapter Three**

Black neko hime, Erza, Guest (x2), H-Nala, IVY, Kaname671, Kris XD, melchormonica8, miel04, PaulaGaTo

 **Author Response:**

Kuon has just been buried under so much crap that he's not sure how to live in society and follow his dreams anymore but Kyoko wants to help him with that. I assure you that Kuon will both end up as an actor and be with Kyoko but the journey to get to that point is a little messy so thank you for your support and your patience 😊 Also, you guys are probably sick of me complaining but one of my biggest pet peeves is when someone only reviews to pressure the writer into more chapters, please don't do that.


	5. Chapter 5 - I'm Not Letting You

**AN:** The scene at the end will be continued in the next chapter

 **Chapter Five – I'm Not Letting You**

"I'm worried about you,"

Usually when one's girlfriend said that it was met by the want to hold her and the feeling of happiness because of her affection for you but it was making Kuon feel the opposite emotions. He stared out the window and dropped his head.

"We should break up again," he replied and Naomi sighed. She didn't believe his words and it showed in her face. Kuon had just had a talk with his father where he had come out upset and not wanting to talk about it. Obviously it wasn't a happy and supportive conversation _and_ he had been hurting himself.

"I'm not going to let you break up with me," Naomi told him and he blinked at her. They had broken up in the past. He didn't know why she was acting this way now. At least they had given it an honest shot this time. Kuon stared at her silently. "I mean, you're not really aware of what you're saying. We just got back together and you're breaking up with me because of problems that you're having with your dad."

"I think I like somebody else," Kuon told her and Naomi sighed.

"You know, I think you'd say anything to hurt me right now because that's what type of person you are, Kuon. You're one of those types of people who had a rough childhood and now you're thinking that nobody in the world understands you and it might be better to be alone." Naomi got down in front of him and squeezed his shoulders as he continued to sit and stare out the window. "Well, I'm not going to give up on you, Kuon. I'm not going to give up on _us._ "

Kuon stared at her. Maybe this was his fault. Honesty didn't work on everyone and Naomi seemed to be convinced that the two of them should be in a relationship. If a girl was this convinced about what should happen between the two of you, shouldn't you at least try to go with the motions. Naomi was kind and intelligent and beautiful and she obviously cared for him but he couldn't get Kyoko off his mind.

…

….

Kyoko looked through the book in front of her. She was studying for her legal classes and was currently going over some definitions which would help in the book. She shuddered as she came to one that reminded her of her own life. 'Parental Neglect'

That chapter would be difficult for her to handle, that was already something that she was positive on. She had always asked herself the questions of why her mother found it near impossible for her to love Kyoko, how important family really was in social situations as well as those that came to ones career.

Her mother hadn't wanted anything to do with her. She was just a leech on her life. Then there was the other side of parental neglect and maybe that's why Kuon was hurting himself. He didn't hate his parents and his parents didn't hate him but they just didn't notice him. He had told her that they were busy and maybe that's how a sweet kid like Corn got hurt in the world.

She had to admit that she hurt _for_ him so she didn't know how he could stand it.

Kyoko sighed and put the book down. She needed to get her thoughts off of her childhood friend. Corn wasn't her boyfriend and in fact, he had his own girlfriend. She would just be standing in the way of his happiness if she got herself further involved. She looked at the book that she had tried to give him to encourage him to audition for the play. It was a good book, a little old and it needed a modern update, but it would be a good play and she just wished that Corn could be more involved in it.

She looked over the rest of the words before sitting on the bed and closed her eyes to take deep breaths in and out. She had managed to get into an amazing university where she would be pursuing a degree in legal studies. She was in the same university where Kuon was working on another degree. She should be able to contact him at any point that she liked but she knew she wasn't his girlfriend. She didn't have the luxury of calling him at any time she liked.

Maybe she just needed some food. She could cook for herself but she dreamed of going to a food cart and eating something hot since it was a little cold outside. She grabbed her coat, decided not to think about Kuon, and went to look around at where she could get food.

She had walked a bit more than she had meant to when she saw a takoyaki stand. Takoyaki from food carts was almost always better than when you sat down to eat it. She moved towards the cart before hearing a woman's voice.

"Mo, these things cause too many calories. What the heck is with the price as well? I mean, you expect me to pay that much just to gain additional weight," Kyoko looked at her before smiling. This woman looked extremely glamorous and dressed up and she was complaining about the price of takoyaki in public.

"Hi," Kyoko said with a tilt of her head as she looked at the tall brunette. She was rather attractive. Kyoko didn't know why someone like this would be frequenting the cart unless it was really good food. "Are you okay?"

"It's none of your business, Mo" the girl said as she tossed her hair back. "I wouldn't waste my time here even if you begged me."

Kyoko looked at her before shaking her head, this girl wasn't her problem to sort out. She went to the man and ordered two servings of the food before offering one to the woman. "Here, I'm not sure if you're some kind of actress or not but please give me the-"

"Why do you think I'm an actress?" the woman asked as she turned to walk away from Kyoko. She certainly had the posture and gait of someone who was either a model or an actress. "I mean, I have appeared in the local stage play, small but significant parts in movies."

"Well, I have an important friend who wanted to be an actor," Kyoko told her and the woman shrugged.

"So what, there are a lot of untalented people who don't have any connections who have dreams of being actors and actresses. People think that all they need in this world is to be rich and famous," she said and Kyoko sighed.

"He is rich…and famous. He's got a really good connection as well," Kyoko mused and the other woman seemed to pay attention to her because of this.

"How great a connection?" she asked as she raised an eyebrow and Kyoko bowed her head. She didn't know whether she was allowed to refer to Kuon as her friend or not. It wasn't as if he were here and she wasn't able to talk about him as if he were her boyfriend.

"He's the son of Hizuri Kuu," Kyoko said and saw the girl's eyes widen as if a lightbulb had turned on in her head. Suddenly, her distance had turned into her grabbing Kyoko's hand with a look like the big bad wolf's when he wanted to eat you up for supper.

"This isn't a lie, is it?" the woman asked and Kyoko shook her head. "Sorry about my coldness before, you never know how many people will manipulate someone like me. My name is Kotonami Kanae and I'd love to meet Hizuri-san," she said and Kyoko took steady breaths in and out. This woman certainly did seem rather excited.

"No, he's a good friend to me," she said and Kanae nodded.

"We should meet again when it's not too cold, Mo," she said and Kyoko blinked as the woman handed her her phone number and Kyoko looked at it. She nodded. "Make sure to bring your friend," she said before leaving and Kyoko hesitated. Maybe telling Kuon these things wasn't in his best interest. She bowed her head.

She needed to figure out a way to talk to him more. She deserved to see him more than this other woman but she still didn't know how to interact with him. Well, she was making friends and connections in Tokyo and that was a very good thing.

As she walked back to her dorm room, Kyoko heard her cell phone buzzing and she pulled it out of her pocket. She grinned whilst blushing as she read the name on the phone. Kuon. Kuon was calling her. No. She had to remain calm. She didn't want to rush into anything too fast.

"Hello," she said in a soft voice as she answered the phone call, "This is Mogami Kyoko."

"Kyoko-chan, it's Kuon," he replied and Kyoko smiled as she heard that. "Would you like to meet me for brunch tomorrow? Just me and you?" he asked and Kyoko tried to hide her smile. Maybe she could convince him into trying to audition for the play. At least she could try to keep his mind off him hurting himself during their time together.

Kyoko nodded but realized that he wouldn't be able to see her, "I'd love that."

…

…

Kyoko came to the café where they had agreed to meet a little earlier than planned and was shocked to see Kuon there staring at the table in a very serious manner. She didn't want to break his concentration but now she was trying to figure out the best way to say hello to him. She had imagined a friendly chat about nothing in particular and now he was staring at the table as if it were the opening to the pits of hell.

She decided to just walk over to him. Even if he was deep in thought, Kuon wasn't scary and she would never want to think of him as scary. As she approached him, she saw him look at her and smile. "Morning," she said as her eyes quickly went to where she had seen him burn himself and then she looked up into his emerald eyes. "How are you feeling today?"

"We should order," Kuon said as he looked at the barista on duty. "Is there anything that you'd like."

"We can go together, there's a number of empty tables," she looked at him before humming. Where was everybody? Was there some type of event that she wasn't aware of?

"Kuu is doing a scene in the city," Kuon explained to her. "He promised that he'd put a little time aside so that he could take photos and sign autographs. You know, actor-type stuff," he said and Kyoko tilted her head to the side as the reading from the previous night entered her mind. Sometimes children would call their parents by their first name if feeling distanced from them.

"Don't you want to be there, to support him? We can go together. I know it's going to be crowded but I wouldn't mind seeing him work," she said and Kuon pushed a hand through his blond hair.

"Is it possible that…" he said weakly and Kyoko looked at him excitedly, "Is it all possible that we don't."

Kyoko paused. This was his father and he didn't want to see him work. Maybe it wasn't important to him because he'd seen it before but the way that he was speaking led Kyoko to believe that Kuon hurting himself was in direct connection to his father.

"Did Naomi want to go?" Kyoko asked and Kuon laughed weakly.

"I tried to break up with her yesterday," he admitted. "We aren't right for each other but she wouldn't let me, she said that my head wasn't in the right space."

Kyoko sighed, she tilted her head to the side and leaned forwards to look at him. "Is it?" she asked.

 **End of Chapter Five**

 **Thank you for reading, reviews are appreciated**

 **Thank you to the reviewers of Chapter Four**

Erza, Guest (x3), Kaname671, Kris XD, ktoll9, misherukuro, paulagato, Valie France

 **Author Response**

I wanted to make Naomi someone who isn't hated but I didn't want Kuon to show her too much affection so I'm pretty happy with how I'm writing her. Kuu's definitely going to have to come to terms with his relationship with Kuon. Thanks for all the support


	6. Chapter 6 - Pay Attention to Your Son

**Chapter Six – Pay Attention to Your Son**

Kuon turned to her as that question repeated itself in his mind. It was complicated but he thought that he was thinking clearly. He had tried to play the role of devoted boyfriend and it just hadn't fit for him. He didn't want for Kyoko to think badly of him though. He looked up at the sky. "That's not the reason that I don't want to see my father," he told her and Kyoko paused.

She had hoped that Kuon would say that there was nothing between himself and Naomi anymore. Maybe she was being selfish but she just wanted what was best for her friend and if he was stringing a girl along then not only was she going to get hurt but he would hurt as well for doing it without meaning to. Kuon was one of those guys who cared about women, at least that's what she had thought he was.

"Do you love her?" Kyoko asked and Kuon froze.

"No," he replied and Kyoko had to hide a smile. She scolded herself for that. Maybe she was starting to be attracted to him but she shouldn't want all of his relationships to fail for her own sake. He might not even have feelings for her of that nature, they had only had their friendship reunion a short time ago.

"You should really end things then," Kyoko advised and Kuon rolled his eyes.

"I thought that's what I just told you. I tried to break up with her yesterday but she wouldn't let me. I can't be with someone that I don't love. Isn't that something that you told me?" he asked and Kyoko nodded. "See, I can't be with someone who I don't have romantic feelings for. It's not healthy for me and it's cruel to her."

Kyoko hummed. That was true and at least Kuon's mind seemed to be in a logical place as far as relationships were concerned but there was more than that, he was suffering in a different manner. Was this to do with his father? Kyoko wouldn't be surprised if it was.

"Did something happen the other day?" she asked and Kuon stared at her confused.

"What other day?" he said wanting clarification. Yes, over the past week things had happened on a number of different days. If he thought about the wrong one though he might be telling Kyoko information that would be better withheld. He saw Kyoko looking at him and he laughed, pushing a hand through his blond hair. "I mean, what day are you talking about? Things happen every day? I mean, Christmas for one thing."

"I'm not talking about Christmas," Kyoko sighed, "You met with your dad the other day and now you don't want to see him. I feel bad poking my nose in because this isn't my place to do so but I'm just wondering if -"

Kuon stared at the sky and cut Kyoko off whilst avoiding eye contact with her, "Do you think people would care if I was dead?"

Kyoko watched him, "Of course," she said without any hesitation but she did worry about what was running through his head to ask such a question. Kuon had burned himself the other day and he seemed to be suffering. Maybe his breaking up with Naomi was hurting him in ways he had yet to notice. Even though she only had the blossoming of affection within her heart for him, she had to keep calm. She definitely didn't want to rush into anything or she'd fall back into how she was during high school and harboring love for the boy that she lived with.

"Really?" he asked her and Kyoko went over and reached up to put her hand on his shoulder.

"Of course. I'd care so much that I don't think I would be able to breathe," she admitted and Kuon blinked at her. He nodded to her and Kyoko smiled as she caught eye contact with him. His emerald eyes were always so incredibly gorgeous to her.

He smiled to her before looking down, "You know how I was going to meet up with my father," he told her and Kyoko nodded. She had just asked a question about that so of course she knew that but it seemed to be important for Kuon to continue so she would wait patiently and listen to what he had to tell her. "I don't know where things went wrong."

"Did he say something rude to you?" Kyoko asked and Kuon closed his eyes.

"He brought another person with him and before you guess, no it wasn't my mother, my mother would have made sense but my dad was so busy working that the agency he's with sent someone to come to dinner with him, somebody my own age," he said and Kyoko frowned. "I don't know, I wanted to talk to my dad about some important things but I felt like he was invading my privacy," Kuon rubbed the back of his neck and Kyoko sighed.

"That must have been really hard for you," she said and Kuon nodded before shrugging.

"It is what it is, my dad doesn't have time for me. If I was an actor myself it would most likely be different but I'm not. I'm not even really in medicine yet, not until I get my post graduate degree and then I have to look around for a residency and complete that. I don't understand what he wants from me."

Kyoko watched him. She felt horrible that he had had to go through that. He was hurting himself and he had wanted to clear things up with his father. That was an understandable situation but nobody wanted to come to a private dinner just to see someone else there. You couldn't disclose something so personal in front of somebody you had never met. What was he thinking?

"Do you have time to study with me tomorrow?" she asked and Kuon looked at her surprised.

"You've always been really smart," he told her and Kyoko shrugged, "I don't think that there's anything that I can really help you with that you don't already know," he said and Kyoko laughed. First of all, because he was older than her and because he was intelligent himself, he could teach her a lot. He had years of experience over her both in life and academically and second, studying together didn't mean she was asking for his help.

"Thank you but I thought that maybe you and I could get together for brunch again. Both look over our separate books and spend some quiet time in each other's presence."

"Because you're worried about me?" Kuon asked slowly, "I'll be okay."

"Because I want to spend time with my friend," Kyoko told him and Kuon nodded.

"Thank you," he said and Kyoko dared herself to move in front of him. She smiled as he opened her arms to embrace her and she went into his hug, wrapping her arms around him as well as she pressed her cheek into his chest. She didn't want to dare tell him that she had any kind of affectionate or loving feeling for him but he was her friend and he needed her. She just wanted to be with him.

"You're welcome," she breathed out unable to afford taking in the smell of his cologne. He was perfect.

…..

…

Kyoko sighed as she walked back to her dorm room later that evening. She felt terrible for her friend. Kuon was obviously trying to follow a career in medicine but Kyoko realized that he wanted to be an actor still. Dreams like the one that Corn had described to her when they were children rarely were forgotten and it didn't seem as if Kuon had forgotten his either.

Kyoko wanted to prove to him that he could still do it. Even if he did become a doctor, he would be able to act on the side even if it was just community theater projects. Kyoko had the feeling that even if it was this smaller work that it would still give him joy.

She wanted to be the best friend that she could and that meant encouraging him to follow his dreams. It sickened her that she might not be able to give him that. Kyoko could hear whispers around her but she hadn't paid much attention to them before. There must be a celebrity close by.

Looking up, Kyoko blinked as she saw Kuu Hizuri walking with a man beside him and her determination rose, her guts getting the best of her. She walked out and stood in front of the celebrity, her fists at her side. "May I speak with you?" she asked even though she knew that there were several class levels between them. Kuu blinked behind his sunglasses at her, surprised to see a young girl addressing him in such a manner.

"I'm sorry," the man beside him said, "Hizuri-san is not giving any photographs or autographs at the time being. Please go to one of the scheduled celebrity meeting events. There is one next month. We are thankful for you coming during that time."

As Kuu nodded and started to walk away, brushing Kyoko off the young girl turned to him.

"Kuon told me what happened," she told him and Kuu stopped turning to look at her. Kyoko could hear the gossip being whispered by other people on the street. "He told me that you invited a third party to the meal he set up with you which…why do you need to set up a _meeting_ with your own son in the first place?" she asked before shaking her head. "He's been physically hurting himself," she said in a manner that only those of Kuu's closeness could hear. She hadn't wanted to tell on him but this was important and it was something that Kuon should be telling his father.

"He's been…" Kuu repeated, "I'm sorry. This isn't the place to talk about this matter."

Kyoko glared at him, shocking the people around her who would have never glared at a mega celebrity in this way. She was only a commoner, she had no right to elevate herself to Kuu's level, or at least those were the thoughts of those around her.

"It's obvious that you don't love your son," she said before walking away and Kuu stared after her, his face showing his regret but he soon adopted the look of an actor, that gentleman's smile, walking away but with Kyoko's words leaving a deep impact on him.

…

…..

Kuon sighed as he took one last look at Naomi's apartment. This time when he had broken up with her she had believed him but he had said something incredibly stupid to her. He had told her that though he was ending their relationship, he was willing to find her a replacement boyfriend. He could just imagine Kyoko's reaction to that, it wasn't a very smart move.

He took a deep breath before hearing his phone ring and tugged it out of his pocket. It couldn't be Naomi, right? She wouldn't have called him already. Well, if she needed to yell at him and call him names then he was glad she was at least reacting to her emotions. Many women did unhealthy things after the termination of a relationship.

Kuon's eyes widened as he saw that it was his father's name on the caller name. He debated whether or not to answer the call but decided to reject it. After that terrible meeting he didn't want anything to do with his father right now. Even if that meant that his father pulled funding for his academics, Kuon could find himself a job to cover the costs and there were other people he could ask for loans though that was a last resort.

After rejecting the call, Kuon heard the phone ring again. His father was calling him again? That was strange, usually his dad only called once and left a quick message and then that was it. He might receive a call two or three weeks later but it was usually him having to make the effort.

Sighing, Kuon answered the phone, "Hello?"

"Hey, son," Kuu said weakly and Kuon had to wonder if something had happened. "Do you want to get together tonight? I can clear my schedule."

"Are you or Mom hurt? Did something happen?" Kuon asked quickly.

"No," Kuu replied slowly, "We're both fine, in good health."

"Then no, thank you," Kuon told him and looked around. He was in the middle of doing nothing but he didn't want his father to know that. "No. I don't want to get together with you," he told him. He didn't want to find himself feeling inadequate again, he wasn't ready to face that again.

 **End of Chapter Six**

 **Thank you for reading, reviews are appreciated**

 **Thank you to the reviewers of Chapter Five**

Black neko hime, Erza, Guest, H-Nala, Kaname671, Kris XD, melochormonica8, Paulagato

 **Author Response**

I didn't want Kyoko to seek out Kuu but I thought it was in character to make her speak to him in that way when she saw him on the street. Usually she would be a lot more respectful but she wants Kuon to be okay and to not hurt anymore.


	7. Chapter 7 - Family Togetherness

**Chapter Seven – Family Togetherness**

Kyoko had been able to visit a nearby café before she planned to meet Kuon. She had managed to purchase black tea for him and had ordered some green tea for herself along with a couple of pastries. She knew that it was unlikely for Kuon to want to eat the pastry but he was studying and she wanted to offer him something. She had her own studying to do but she had a book in her bag and was going to sit opposite him and read. As long as they spent some time together it would be great.

Kyoko was able to spot Kuon in the library at an empty table and came over to him, putting the teas to the side and putting a hand on the back of his shoulder. "You seem to be studying hard," she said before hearing Kuon's phone vibrate at the bottom of his bag. "Are you meeting somebody else?" she asked and Kuon shook his head.

Kyoko sat down but her eyes kept drifting over to the phone. Kuon wasn't likely to keep his phone on in the library unless he was waiting for somebody to call him.

"Ignore it," Kuon told her as he looked at her, "It's been doing that for two days now," he said and Kyoko looked at him curiously. He was ignoring his phone for that long? "I guess I can turn it on now that you're here."

"You had it on because of me?" Kyoko blushed as she took her book out and saw Kuon write something down in a notebook. Kyoko wanted to ask him whether he had reconsidered auditioning but she was a little nervous as well. Kuon had been hurting himself not so long ago and he possibly still could be. She wanted to try to step cautiously so that she didn't set off a ticking bomb.

"Of course. We were meeting to study again," Kuon said as the phone dinged saying that a voicemail had been left. When it stopped making sound, he pulled it out of his bag and silenced the phone by turning it off. Kyoko had a glance at the name who had called him and read one word that she never had a chance to use 'Dad'.

"Did you see?" Kuon asked and Kyoko shook her head, putting her hands up in defense.

"No. No, that's your private phone and your private phone calls, I wouldn't look at it. It would be disrespectful for me to look at it," she said and Kuon raised an eyebrow wondering why she was protesting with so much energy. It made him feel that she actually was reading what appeared on the home screen.

"Well, whether you looked or not. It's my dad," Kuon tried to explain and Kyoko watched him. She had heard from Kuon that he admired and respected his father and that his dad was usually very busy so he must be trying to make up for it by calling Kuon so frequently. "I've already told him that I don't want to talk with him."

"He's probably worried about you," Kyoko tried to explain and Kuon nodded. He looked away. It didn't matter whether his father was concerned about him or not, he didn't know how to be a supportive figure in his life and Kuon didn't want to feel that he was being distanced from his family.

"I've asked him to give me some time. I don't know why he suddenly doesn't listen to that," Kuon sighed before focusing on the medical textbook in front of him. His father had only had a surface relationship with him for a long time and Kuon was reminded of that when he had come to the meal with him with somebody else. He shouldn't have done that when they had actually arranged to meet. All his dad really cared about was his acting career and it was the main shadow that was cast over Kuon's previous dreams of being a film and TV star.

"It must be nice for him to call though," Kyoko commented and Kuon shrugged.

"He probably just feels guilty for an unknown reason and I'm not really interested in helping him feel better or absolving his guilt for him. I'd prefer to figure things out for myself. It's been that way since I was a little kid. Maybe I could call my mother though," he said and Kyoko nodded.

Although she hoped that by making a public spectacle of herself, she had influenced Kuon's father to try to make contact with him, she didn't want for Kuon to feel that she had overstepped her boundary. She wanted to help him but she shouldn't have interfered. She was just so worried and concerned for him.

"That would probably help," she said before looking down at her own books. "How about if we just study, you have that lab examination coming up with the cadaver, right?" she asked and Kuon laughed as he looked at her, watching her with interest.

"Not a lot of girls would be able to say that last sentence with a straight face," he commented and Kyoko smiled but continued to look down. Hopefully he would stop comparing her to other girls and realize that she was a unique individual. She didn't want to be just another booty call in his cellphone.

…

…

Kuon looked out the window of his apartment as he held the phone close to his cheek. He hadn't wanted to call his father and calling his mother seemed to be wanting to achieve the same goal but if his mother was worrying about him then he should at least inform her that things were okay and why he was avoiding the call.

It was picked up after the third ring, "Hello, darling" Julie said excitedly as she answered. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, Mom," Kuon said with a nervous laugh. "How are you? I thought that I'd check in," he sighed and pushed a hand through his blond hair. He felt uncomfortable being in contact with his mother but he had to keep reminding himself that he hadn't called his father, he hadn't made contact with his _father._

"Your dad is worried about you," Julie tried to explain. "I know that the phone calls were a little much but he's trying. I don't want you to lose the relationship that you and your father have," she worried and Kuon rolled his eyes. What kind of a relationship was that anyway?

"I _am_ looking for a job," Kuon tried to explain and Julie stayed quiet, "I will pay you and Dad back for the money that you've spent on my tuition. I just need time," he commented and Julie took slow breaths.

"Getting a job is okay but we're not investing in your future because we're expecting you to pay us back and even if you are having problems with your father, that doesn't change anything about your schooling. We're happy to pay," she said before giving a slow exhale. "What did your father do this time?"

"What makes you think that Dad did something?" Kuon asked and Julie sighed again.

"So, I'm taking that as a yes," she replied and Kuon closed his eyes. He wanted more time to think this over but yes, the truth was that bringing another person to their dinner was the main reason for him wanting to ignore his father's attempts to contact him. "What happened?"

"Does it matter?" Kuon asked he put a hand on his forehead and tried to distract himself by looking out of the window, "Maybe you should discuss it with Dad, I mean, if he's not telling you then he obviously doesn't think that it's a big deal."

"Let's say that he didn't tell me and that he doesn't think that it's a big deal," Julie commented wanting to help her son whenever he felt any kind of hurt. "It's something that is bothering you so that's important to me. Sometimes your father sticks his foot in his mouth and says some things that he doesn't mean."

"And sometimes he arranges to meet with his son for them to have lunch and talk and he brings some random stranger with him making the meeting useless because I don't want to air my problems in front of somebody that I've never met," Kuon groaned and Julie was silent for a few moments.

"He did that?" she asked in disbelief. She didn't know what on earth inspired him to do that or why he thought it was a good idea. Kuon was always so independent. He wouldn't ask for help usually and whenever he had asked Julie, she had felt happy that he had wanted her to know and was seeking her advice. She wouldn't take something like that so lightly.

"I'll talk to him but Kuon, can you do me a favor?" she asked and Kuon bowed his head. He sighed realizing that he wanted to help his mother. If she really did need for there to be open communication between him and his father then he would do it, he would do it reluctantly but he would do it for her.

"I want you to come to dinner," Julie said and Kuon hesitated. That might mean seeing his father face to face and he wasn't sure what to say to him. "On Friday, after your class."

"I'll have touched a cadaver by then," Kuon said nervously and Julie paused.

"Well hopefully you'll have washed your hands before you come to dinner," Julie told him. "I mean, as proud as I am that you're becoming a young doctor who gets some of the best grades in your class, I think that doctors in particular have to practice proper hygiene. I promise that I won't be the one cooking, I'll have it catered."

Kuon sighed and looked up at the ceiling feeling exhausted but his mother was trying her best to help him solve things with his father. "I don't know," Kuon told her honestly and then bowed her head as he could hear a tinge of disappointment from the other end of the line. "Fine. Would I be able to bring a friend?" he asked.

"Is it a girlfriend?" Julie asked excitedly and Kuon laughed weakly.

"No. She's just a friend. She's a law student actually, I don't even know if she'd agree to come but if I am to face Dad then I want someone who will be a support to me. Would that be okay for me to invite her?" Kuon hesitated and Julie laughed.

"Well, if your father thinks it's proper to bring a stranger to your meeting without any forewarning, he doesn't have the right to get upset about anything," Julie stated and Kuon looked down. He didn't even know if Kyoko would be interested in going but he did want to spend more time with her. "I love you, honey," Julie told him. "I'm looking forward to seeing you two."

"I love you too," Kuon said and put the phone down. So, he wasn't getting out of getting in contact with his father despite wanting to. He sighed and fiddled with his phone. Hopefully Kyoko would understand why he was asking her to come to dinner. Hopefully she would say yes.

He sighed, why did he always depend on her for her support?

 **End of Chapter Seven**

 **Thank you for reading, reviews are appreciated**

 **Thank you to the reviewers of Chapter Six**

Black neko hime, brennakai, Erza, H-Nala, Kaname671, Kris XD, PaulaGaTo


	8. Chapter 8 - Accompany Me?

**AN:** Oh my god, it's been so long since I've updated this fic. It's just been a suuuper busy year for me this year

 **Chapter Eight – Accompany Me?**

Kyoko stared at Kuon as he stood in front of her with a weak look on his face and one of her favorite pastries from a little bakery near the university. She had said that she loved them and had even eaten them with him on a couple of occasions. Kyoko still wasn't sure why he was behaving so stiffly though. "Hey," she smiled as she turned to examined him and Kuon attempted to hide his smile.

"Hi," he told her with a weak smile, "I have a favor I need to ask of you," he said awkwardly and Kyoko laughed. He really did look cute in this moment and she enjoyed the fact that he had come to her when he could have gone elsewhere.

"Okay, let me hear it," she winked and Kuon leaned his head back.

"Would you be my dinner date?" he asked and Kyoko blushed. She had to wonder what a date with Kuon would be like but she wasn't sure that they should rush into anything so fast. She wasn't the most prepared when it came to love and if it was with Kuon then she wanted for it to be absolutely perfect. Besides, she just wanted Kuon to be happy and only after getting out of his relationship did he seem any happier.

"I'd love to be your dinner date but is that the same as a date-date?" Kyoko asked and Kuon paused with widened eyes and a dropped jaw. Kyoko knew he was attempting to not insult her but also to find the right way in telling her the truth, "I'd love to go as friends," she said taking the first move and Kuon rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly.

"Yeah, that's what I was thinking too," he laughed awkwardly and Kyoko watched him with a smile.

"Then where are we going? I'm sure that somewhere with the great Kuo-" Kuon shot Kyoko a look as she started to slip into lala land. She knew that he was thinking of the fangirls who swarmed around his father and family was a touchy subject for him right now. There was also the fact that she had completely lost her mind and yelled at his father. She had had an out-of-body experience and it was those feelings of not wanting to be in love but finding yourself falling for someone that caused it. No. She had to steer the conversation away from.

"I agreed to a family dinner," Kuon said and Kyoko turned to look at him again.

Kyoko's back straightened as she looked at him but then smiled. Despite being younger than him, Kyoko knew that she was mature for her age. She only hoped that she could leave a good impression on his parents. They weren't even dating. It was intimidating for girlfriends to meet their boyfriends parents, should it be so intimidating for friends? "I'll try my best to make a good first impression," she grinned and Kuon sighed.

"Don't go overboard, it's just a family dinner. I mean, if they expect me to eat there right now then they should accept my girl," Kuon looked a little embarrassed as he caught himself, "all of my friends. They usually are such understanding people but my dad is…"

"Well, I'll prove to you how much he cares," Kyoko said as she accepted the pastry from him and Kuon smiled gratefully. "So, are you going to let me help you study?" she asked and Kuon shrugged.

"Well, how about I help you study," he winked. Kyoko laughed with him feeling a lot of joy being around him. She didn't want to think of him hurting himself or being in pain. She just wanted times like this. She just wanted to enjoy times like this.

…

…

Kyoko sat nervously in the car as Kuon closed the door for her. She was wearing a cute dress with knitted jacket and boots. She looked cute and Kuon had commented on it more than once. He was wearing a green button-down shirt and jeans with a leather jacket.

"Thanks for doing this with me," Kuon said as he started the car up and Kyoko watched him. It cost a lot of money to have a car in this city and that was most likely something that Kuu was paying for but she didn't want to say anything. The relationship between a father and son wasn't something she knew much about and even when she looked at Shotaro, he was pretty spoiled himself.

She saw Kuon's hand go towards the radio and pull back and turned to face him. "I'm okay with whatever you want to play and I'm excited, you seem to really like your mother," she said honestly and Kuon nodded with a smile.

"She's amazing," he laughed as he thought of the very loving mother who could turn into a possessive mother bear if anyone were to insult him. She was very protective of him and he would feel lucky to be their child were it not for knowing how his father perceived him. "She's one of those mothers who would give up everything for her kid whether good or bad but she's….she's not really there sometimes, she loves fairytales and music and makeup and it sometimes takes prompting before she notices that there's a problem. I think that she lives in her own world but she's beautiful and talented and she doesn't make me feel that I'm doing anything wrong."

"I'm sure that your father just doesn't know that you're hurting as well," Kyoko commented and Kuon smiled at her but sighed, obviously disagreeing with that statement. Kyoko really hoped that they could figure this out. Kuon had such love for his mother, hopefully he felt the same way about his father as well.

As Kuon drove, Kyoko noticed how the streets were looking nicer and nicer with well built stone buildings and the type of landscape that she didn't think existed in Tokyo or even around Tokyo. These were starting to look like the mansions from cartoon shows where you wanted to overstate the presence of a certain family and how important they were. These types of buildings looked more of a fantasy to her than the fairy woods.

"These houses are huge," she commented and Kuon raised an eyebrow to that as he looked at her but then just nodded and smiled. Kyoko saw him turn into a gated house that looked bigger than others and he punched a code into the door before it opened for him. He drove the car to the side and then sat there as the door closed. He hung his head trying to calm himself down. "Are you okay?" Kyoko asked as she placed her hand on his wrist.

"This was a bad idea," Kuon said in a near panic, "I should never have gotten you involved. I don't want to be here. I shouldn't have come back here," he said as his wide eyes focused on the dashboard of the car. Kyoko looked at him concerned.

"We could leave really quickly," she said but then saw a blonde woman approaching them, she put a hand to his shoulder and Kuon lifted his head from where he had it on the driving wheel. He saw his mother lean down so she could look in on them.

"Hi," she said as Kuon opened the door and Julie reached her hand out for Kyoko, leaning partly across Kuon. "I'm Hizuri Julienna, please come in and make yourself comfortable."

"Mogami Kyoko," Kyoko squeaked as they shook hands and as Julie stood up straight again, Kyoko was impressed that she was such a tall woman with amazing, long legs that were just an additional part of her beauty. "It's so nice of you to invite me. I'm very thankful that I get to be invited to your home. I've never seen a home like this."

"Well," Julie smiled, "We lived in a bigger house in the US but Kuu really found more work over here and so we moved," she tried to explain and Kuon got out of the car, quickly joined by Kyoko. "It'll be okay, sweetheart. He's already promised me that he'll listen to you."

"What if I don't have anything to say to _him_?" Kuon asked and Julie sighed before Kyoko looked at Kuon with a weak smile. They were stopped when they heard the sound of Kuu approaching them and Kyoko felt her chest pull in as her breaths tightened. Kuu however was more interested in Kuon and Kuon was definitely not interested in speaking to his father.

"How about we get dinner ready?" Julie asked before turning to Kyoko, "You look like a very helpful, friendly, girl," she complimented the younger student, "Why don't you come in the kitchen with me and help. I'd very much appreciate it."

"You mean leave these two…" Kyoko said quietly as Kuon tried to avoid contact with Kuu who seemed desperate to make it with him. Julie kept trying to nudge Kyoko into the house.

Kuu took a step forward, "Kuon, I really do feel that we need to talk. I did something very inappropria-" he said and Kuon shook his head, still working against giving even the slightest of eye contact to his father.

"I don't want to hear this," Kuon sighed before shaking his head. "How many more mistakes do you need to make for me to be heard? Disown me for all I care. I don't know how it feels to have a caring father anyway," he said and Kyoko looked between them. She could see that flash of heartache in Kuu's eyes. Kuu HIzuri obviously wasn't used to being treated this way but that sadness was deeply embedded into his son's heart.

"Kuon, if I made a mistake," Kuu said as he changed his stance to try to be more welcoming, more open, but to Kyoko it was as if she were watching a play where all of the movements were calculated. Was this how it felt to be an actor? You knew how to move your body to manipulate the other person into feeling how you wanted them to feel?

"I don't want to be here anyway," Kuon said as he finally stared at his father but it showed the years of pain that he was feeling, the things that Kuu had never been aware of before. "I don't want to talk with you. I don't want to ruin your reputation, I never have, but you've never been concerned about anyone other than yourself."

"Kuon, I don't think what you're saying is fair," Kuu argued and Kuon looked to his mother before shaking his head and bowing it.

"No, it's not fair but nothing in this life is fair, Dad. Nothing is as it should be. You shouldn't be trying to squeeze in work during a meal with your _son_. You shouldn't be completely blind to the pain that I'm feeling. I wish that we could do this where Kyoko isn't watching," he said and Kyoko rushed forwards and took Kuon's hand in her own.

"It's okay," she said as she tried to place a hand on his upper back to show her support. "It's okay, I came here because you needed help. I'm not going to leave just because things get a bit emotional. I promise," she said. She was glad that she was a friend and not a girlfriend here but regardless, that wouldn't really have changed very much. She would still have been supporting him.

"Let me ask you a question, okay, Dad?" Kuon asked as the tears could be seen in his own eyes.

Kuu nodded, "Okay. What question is that?"

"Would you…" Kuon said trying to keep his words very balanced and without showing too much pain or sadness into them, the question would be enough, he didn't need to add more emotion to it. "Would you even care if I died other than it hurting your reputation?"

 **End of Chapter Eight**

 **Thank you for reading, reviews are appreciated**

 **Thank you to the reviewers of Chapter Seven**

Black neko hime, Guest, H-Nala, Kaname671, KL93, KrisXD, melchormonica8, Ndy, Sara,


	9. Chapter 9 - The Slow Response

**Chapter Nine – The Slow Response**

Kuu took a deep breath in, he watched his son wondering when to take the first step forward. Of course he would care if he died. He was his son. However, he was working it over in his mind how badly his son's death would change his career. That made it so he was struck speechless for a moment and even Kyoko had to stare between the two men in shock and then look at Kuu annoyed.

Kuon had had enough of this though and he took Kyoko's hand, leading her to his car.

"Kuon!" Julie yelled as she came over to him, she tried to stop him by grabbing his upper arm. "It's okay. I'm sure your father is just stunned by the question. Please know that there is a lot of baggage to unpack here. You'd be caught -"

"Yes," Kuu said, too little too late, "I would care."

Kuon stared at him before shaking his head in utter disgust. Had his dad really taken his time to give what should be an automatic answer. His mother would say it before he even finished the question. He turned away and shook his head. "I'm really sorry, Mom," he told her and Julie tried to hold him to make him wait.

"Of course I would care," Kuu tried to reason with his son. "You're very -"

"I know that you used those additional moments because you wanted to evaluate how much of an impact it _would_ have to your career. Hell, I'm so invisible to you that they'd give you the sympathy vote and it would probably improve your career. I'm not a kid anymore and I'm done with you. I know that I can't pay back all the money that you've given me but I'm not going to take any more of it," Kuon told them and Julie hesitated. She knew that her son had good work ethic but she also knew that they were paying his tuition and his rent. If he cut them off what would he do? He wouldn't have anywhere to go. He'd have to give up on his medical dreams.

"Kuon, listen. If you don't want your father to be involved then please let me, you've worked too hard for your career. I understand if you want your father to not be involved in your life but you have to have some way of surviving," Julie tried to reason with him. She shot a glare back to her husband. He had ruined all of this for Kuon who was only here reluctantly.

"I said that I care!" Kuu yelled after him and Kuon sighed, he had put up too much of a defense around himself to allow his father to just try to enter his life again by doing the bare minimum. Kuu rushed forwards and put a hand on the car door, making sure that Kuon didn't enter it. "I care about you. I do. Your question caught me off guard. I mean, talking about death so casually."

"I'm not talking about it casually at all," Kuon replied. He looked at his father before sighing, he rolled up his sleeve to show one of the burn marks on his body. "Would it put you in too much shock to speak if I told you that I've attempted to kill myself in the past?" he asked and Kuu hesitated, he wasn't used to seeing this type of burn and self-harm away from the filming set.

"Where did you get that?" Kuu asked and Julie turned to her husband.

"Kuu, don't," she whispered with a shake of her head. She turned back to Kuon who was looking at his dad horrified. This man really didn't care about him. "Kuon. I know that I'm already asking you for a lot but I need to talk to you privately and in person," she said with her fists tightening, "I don't want you running off tonight and doing something that you might regret."

Kuon looked between Kyoko and his mother. He had promised that he would drive Kyoko to and from the dinner. He didn't want to jut abandon her for his mother's wishes when it might not go anywhere.

Kyoko turned to him with a strong smile, "It's okay. I'll call a car to take me home," she tried to assure Kuon. "I think you need to talk with her."

Kuon opened his mouth to argue but Kyoko had already taken her phone out of his pocket. He looked at his mother and nodded. Julie watched as he said good night to Kyoko and then led him into his old bedroom, ignoring Kuu who was trying to give his reasons for waiting so long to answer.

As Kuon entered the house and Kyoko finished with the call, she turned to face 'Japan's greatest actor.'

"I could never please my own mother," Kyoko said in a steady manner. "She always disliked me. She never made me feel nurtured, it was other people in my life who did that. Still, I wanted to be loved by her, I still want to be loved for her. I know that it's out of line for me to say this to you but you are missing out on something amazing with Kuon. I know that it's not my place to ask you this but would you really care if something happened to him and he was injured or disfigured."

Kuu took a deep breath in and he turned to Kyoko confused, "Disfigured?" he asked and Kyoko shook her head. She didn't feel that she had a right to speak to him in this disrespectful manner, she was going against many of her own moral codes from acting like a brat but she just wanted for Kuon to feel loved by a man whom it was obvious he was craving the love from.

"I bet if he had an accident and had a scar across one eye and down his face that _couldn't_ be covered up with make up and couldn't be treated by surgery, you wouldn't even want to get photographed with him." Kyoko felt her heart pounding in her chest. This was unlike her. She usually wouldn't voice her opinions but the truth was that she felt that if his mother couldn't get through to him, she might never see Kuon alive again and that would devastate her.

"Why wouldn't I want my photograph to be taken with him? He's my son. I would want to protect him. That's the only reason why I wouldn't want people to take his photograph, if he didn't want it. People in the media can be cruel," Kuu argued and Kyoko turned to him.

"Why can't you show Kuon that you love him like this? Is your workaholic nature that bad that you've always neglected a child who cares about you and their opinion on his life. If he didn't care, he wouldn't have been hurting himself. He wants your approval and your love so badly," Kyoko attempted to reason with him as she waited for the taxi to arrive. Inside she was screaming internally about being so rude and ignoring the hierarchy that Japanese society put into place.

"I do love him. I don't want him to get hurt. Yes, the world can be cold and cruel but I've always wanted Kuon to be independent and able to look out for himself." Kyoko looked at him in a way that was asking if he truly believed that or if it was his way of covering up for his own guilt.

"It's the love from one's family which is most important. The world can be harsh but being ignored by one's parent, especially one they admire so much, that can be the most painful feeling in the world." Kyoko heard the taxi pull up and dropped into a formal bow. "I hope that you will excuse me for my rudeness just then. I wish that you have a good night, Hizuri-san."

Kuu nodded as he started to recognize all the signs of the hurt that he had inflicted upon Kuon without meaning to. He loved his son. He always loved his son with his whole heart. He had acted like a jerk and even though this girl might regret saying it, it was the truth. Maybe if he spent some time alone with his son then Kuon would start to realize how deeply he was cared for.

….

….

Kyoko let her head rest against the window in the taxi cab. She felt that she might have just been unforgivably rude but part of her didn't care about that. Kuon had a lot of pain in his life and although Kyoko wanted for Kuon to help her with her own issues, this had been the case all of her life. Kyoko had surrounded herself with people who were insecure or self-centered or narcissistic and they rarely formed a view outside of themselves.

Had she always wanted to be a lawyer? No. Her desire to be a lawyer had stemmed from her mother but also when she knew how much help lawyers could provide – good lawyers anyway – she had wanted to be able to provide those services. She selfishly imagined how life would be if one spouse was a doctor and the other a lawyer, two very lucrative career moves. Still, if Kuon ever bravely decided that he would be an actor over a doctor, she would support him. Kyoko blushed as she felt shameless thinking of herself being married to Kuon.

What she wished for most though was that the words which he had shared with his father wouldn't come back to haunt her. Kuon wasn't the strong person she had always imagined that he'd be and he needed to free himself from his own demons. His father needed to play a role in his life so that he could exterminate those things causing him pain.

Kyoko laughed a little at the play on words. Role. Yes, maybe the greatest role that Kuu Hizuri would ever play would be the role of a caring and loving father. Was he even capable of doing so. For Kuon's sake, Kyoko wished that he would be. She laughed again and the driver checked his mirror to turn back to look at her.

"Are you all right, miss?" he asked her and Kyoko nodded.

"Yes, just thinking about something funny," she said before bowing her head and sighing. When Kuon had said that he would be cutting himself off from his own family, that worried her greatly. She was hoping that his mother would talk some sense into him. Kuon had told her that he felt he was being loaned the money for his tuition and that he intended to pay it all back one day, it would be easier when he became a resident at a hospital for him to do that.

Could he be both though? Could he be a doctor that also acted? Some people had part time jobs, maybe Kuon could have that as well but it really all depended on how the talks with his parents went. Kyoko sighed, she shouldn't be so selfish as to only consider her own problems and emotions. She felt her phone vibrate and pulled it out hoping that it was Kuon giving her an update on the situation.

However, as she held the phone in her hands in front of her, her body felt cold and frozen. Why was _she_ calling her right now?

Why was Saena Mogami calling her?

 **End of Chapter Nine**

 **Thank you for reading, reviews are appreciated**

Thank you to the reviewers of Chapter Eight

Black neko hime, Erza, Guest, H-Nala, Kaname671, Kris XD, Kumioko


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